i've been quoted!

Oh my goodness! I've been quoted in the paper! How fun! Last week our newspaper put out a call for submissions on the after life. The article was titled, "What Happens When We Die?". Well I couldn't pass up the opportunity! I sent in a fairly long submission and in it I outlined step by step how to become a Christian. I also gave permission to print all or some of the article so long as what was printed remained in tact. (didn't want any mis-quoting, especially with a subject of this magnitude!) Well I didn't hear back so I assumed that meant they weren't going to use my submission. Durn it. But then today my mom e-mailed me and told me I was quoted! I don't get the paper, we usually buy one on the way home from church, but the boy was sick today so we didn't go to church today. (first Sunday missed in 8 months! EEK!) So I had to wait until Scott got home from work for a paper. Finally, FINALLY, he gets home with the paper and I tear in. My beautifully written, spell checked twice, elegant submission was reduced down to one line. :( At first I was dissapointed but then I read and re-read the line that he'd quoted me on and now I'm pretty happy with the one-liner that he took out of what I sent in. So gals, here's the link:

http://reporternews.com/news/2007/sep/29/the-after-life/

And you can find my quote 3rd from the bottom. :) I do recommend reading the entire article though. It was really neat hearing what others thought about the afterlife. Although (as I'm quite sure you will also) I am now praying for several of the people that wrote in.

come you fountain

Oh girls do I have a funny story for you! Today was BSF day (more on it when I've got time, it was amazing though!) and Daniels first day to come with me. I was a bit nervous dropping him off at a new place with new people, but he went right in and did great. He had the BEST time. On the way to the car he talked about the game they played where he got to kick the big blue ball across the room, and then they had a Bible story about how God made Jesus be born, and that they got to sing songs. He L-O-V-E-S to sing. Anything. So this of course was the highlight of his stay at BSF today. So we get in the car and he's singing something under his breath. So I ask him what he's singing. Are you ready for this? He says, "come you fountain". Now me being the good Christian mom that I am I tell him that I don't recognize that song and maybe if he sang it a bit I'd know what song it was. So at the top of his lungs he sings

"COME YOU FOUNTAIN, BE A BLESSING...."

and trailed off. I about died laughing. He was singing "Come Thou Fount"! First I thought it was really cool that he was keeping good time, and then really silly the way he was singing it. Oh girls, he is SO sweet! And so all the way home he kept repeating, "come you fountain, be a blessing..." (it's all he could remember). I think it is so sweet that they are teaching the little ones to sing hymns. I don't know many at all, so I'm struggling with them too. :) But there's just something sweet about hearing a 3 year old sing a hymn. Oh he is so stinkin precious!!!

what do you expect?

So I started BSF. It's awesome. A little more intimidating than my gung-ho spirit is able to manage, but I'll get there in time. The women are incredibly nice and willing to help with anything. I felt so out of place though. I'm 28. The youngest in the bunch. Most were matured in age, others in their 40's. And here and there I would spot one, maybe two ladies my age. So (please don't take offense) at first I thought I'd entered the wrong building. I showed up in my jean capris, sandals, and ponytail and was met with a gorgeous woman in a business suit, heels, and hose. This was followed by more of the same. So I felt like I stuck out like a sore thumb. I know I must have looked like the lost-sheep-deer-in-the-headlights-dope that I felt like because several of the women rushed over to put and arm around me and lead me to where I needed to go. Thank God for those women. I laugh now, but I was mortified then. I felt like a MAJOR country bumpkin. But God met me. Right in my uncomfortableness. Right in my feeling like I was totally OUT OF MY LEAGUE. Right in my "where is the nearest exit" scaredness, He met me.

We are studying Matthew this year. Yes year. We're taking a year to go through the book chapter by chapter. I think that is really neat. In BSF there are no workbooks or videos. It's simply you and your Bible. Really neat. But I'm off topic. We got to the part where we get to read about Jesus' geneology. I love this part. I love reading all the people God used to make our Jesus. One of my favorite characters in the Bible is Rahab. So when I get to the point where she is mentioned in the blood-line of Christ I always silently throw up a hand and say "whoop whoop!" (okay, sometimes out loud but only if no one is around). And so our question was, are the type of people you would have expected God would have used to create a king? We were then asked to go down the list of women in the line-up and mention on fact about each woman. Sheesh. It became an interesting list. If you've never done it, try it. But that reminded me of the question our leader opening up lecture time with.

What do you expect of God? Why do you expect it?

Hmmm. I started making a list. It included expecting God to, meet my needs, help me raise good Christian young men, give me the patience to handle some issues, so on and so on... Then I realized why the question was asked. I was expecting God to cater to me. To fit into my box. To meet not only what I physically needed, but to also meet those things that I think I need. Very awakening moment. So I asked God to show me throughout this week when my expectations of Him conflict with His expectations of me. And He has proven faithful. There are some definate areas in my life that need some adjustment! When it came down to the why well, I'm not really sure why I expected those things of God. I know without a doubt that God will supply my needs. My REAL needs. But why on earth did I expect the rest? It's something I'm still praying over and asking God to reveal to me.

Are there things that you expect of God that might be unrealistic? Let me toss the question to you know...

What do you expect of God? Why do you expect it? Why do you think God used who He did in Christs' lineage?

I'm really looking forward to your answers! If it's too personal to post, please know I'd never want you to post anything you didn't feel right about. You can simply reflect in your own quiet time. I hope God blesses you the way He did this week. Some lessons are not comfortable to learn, but they just might be the best lessons you'll ever recieve from our Abba Father.

crock pot recipes

for everyone waiting on recipes from me, I have not forgotten you! I'm working on typing them in for our local church cook-book fundraiser and will pass them on to you as well. :) Just might take a few more days. Thank you everyone for asking for them, ya'll sure do know how to make a girl feel good!!! :)

hold me fast

Okay, I'm still stuck on Psalm 139. I'm reading it ever so slowly each night, taking out what I can and working it over. God has pressed this Psalm on me since Sunday. I have to say I'm really enjoying it. Today, just now, I re-read verse 10 over and over.

"even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast" (NIV)

David is talking about how far away from God he can get, but yet he knows that God will still guide him, no matter how out of "reach" he is. And then says the peculiar (well to me anyway) line of, "your RIGHT HAND will hold me fast" (emphasis mine). I kept reading it over and over and then a though occured to me that I want to run past you. To those who allready get it, please humor me, I'm new to this. :)

Who is at the right hand of God? Jesus Christ. Is this verse a bit of foreshadowing? I believe so! You see, no matter how far away from God we go, if we are His, He's still there. He will always be there to guide us. And I want to suggest that when David says "your right hand" he's talking about Jesus. You see, Jesus came to die on the cross so that we might forever be held fast in God's arms. Jesus paved the way for us to be able to come to God for anything and everything. So when David says God's right hand will hold him fast, he is giving us a little insight into what is going to occur I believe. He knew that he would not only have God's guidance, but that he would also have God's unfailing love that comes through His "right hand", His son. Am I making sense? Some of you that are smarter than I (and yes I know you're out there!) let me know what you think. Am I way off base here? I don't think so, but again I'm new to this. Either way, tonight I'm praising God for not only giving me some fresh understanding and perspective, but also for sending His son to die so that I might be held fast to Him by His right hand.

Father I thank you for pressing in on me tonight. I thank you for giving me a fresh breath into your word. Thank you for sending your son that I might be not only in your way everlasting, but also that through your Son I may be held fast to you, not matter where I go. I love you Lord. You know the cry of my heart tonight and I'm leaving it at your feet. Sweet sweet Father of mine, I love you. Amen.

a long afternoon

Here I sit. Disappointed. Hurt. Upset. And wondering. Wondering why. I had a job interview yesterday. It was for a job that I'd applied for 18 months ago and was turned down. It had come back open and this time I was determined. After two grueling weeks of pre-interview after pre-interview. It came down to 4. 3 other couples, and us. Yesterday was our final interview. Everything was right on. We'd sailed through all the other interviews. The girls that worked there really liked me and told me they'd told their boss that. Everything was going perfect. We prayed and headed to the interview. It was going great. A few things we'd had questionable looks on, but nothing so big that I didn't think we wouldnt' get the job. I was supposed to know by noon today. Noon rolled around. No call. One-o-clock - no call. Finally I call them at two. Talked to the girl that I really liked the most and unfortunatly for both of us, she had to deliver the bad news. They'd gone with someone else. And she didn't know why. She was upset that it hadn't been me. I was definatly upset that it hadn't been me. But why? Everything had gone so well. Finally this afternoon the boss called and we talked. While I didn't like the answer (same excuse he gave me last time) I told him that I understood his situation and that while I didnt' agree with it, I did respect his decision.

Mad. I was mad. Why put me through all that again, an even more pressured process than before, to give me the same line again? We'd prayed about it. This was it. Or so it felt. Feels. I couldn't even get the words out to Scott, but he knew through my tears. This would have been huge for us. I feel like a fish from whom the baits been snatched. So I went to be alone. I turned on the radio and God met me in the state I was in. Right there, sitting in front of the stereo, feeling as if I couldn't get any lower. The song, "Cry Out To Jesus" came on. That's just like you sweet Abba Father. And I did. I cried. And cried some more. And I still haven't really stopped. I had promised myself I wouldnt' get my hopes up this time, but I did. The more hurdles we passed the better I felt about getting the job. My hopes were soaring. And just like that, not.

But in all of this, one thing is constant. One thing soars, and never comes down. He loves me. He loves me girls. Tonight I'll be resting in Him. I'm not going to worry about the why. I can't change it. I'm not going to worry about not getting the job, I can't change the decision. So I'm not going to bring myself down, or beat myself up. It really didn't have anything to do with me.

He loves me. And girls - THAT is it!

Awaken - Natalie Grant (Curb Records) video for Ignite!

this video goes with my blog below.

wake me up!

Have you ever felt like you just need to be shaken? Woken up from a deep sleep? Jolted into a reality that's REAL?? Today we studied Psalm 139. Powerful words. The ones that hit me this morning were verses 23 & 24. I've always imagined David on a high rock standing with his arms stretched to the Heavens pleading for God to:

"Search me, O God, and know my heart;

test me and know my anxious thoughts.

See if there is any offensive way in me,

and lead me in the way everlasting."

Emphasis is mine. Can you see it girls? Can you see David, arms reaching as far as he can reach them. Saying to our Lord, "come to me! Search me! Show me my sin!". I wonder if he added, "take my sin! fill me with YOU! Come Lord, come to me! YOU are all I want!". I think I may be projecting the cry of my heart onto David. Sometimes I feel like I'm in a haze and I just need someone to shake me and say WAKE UP! (Of course if it's my hubby he'll add "you're snoring!") But David, he wasn't just asking God to show him his sin, he was asking him to point it out. Ouch. I know I have sins that I'd like to bury and never have to deal with. I think we all know though, sooner or later it comes out and must be dealt with in one way or another. It's almost like David is asking God to perform surgery. Take OUT what's bad and replace it with YOU Lord! Here's a question from my concordance that really got me thinking on the way home from church. How are we to recognize sin, UNLESS God points it out? But here's is the BEST part of these verses. Once we ask God to point out our sins, we are then given the opportunity to repent of them and turn our lives back to God. I think that is what David was doing. He wanted to be in God's "way everlasting" and knew the only way to get there was for God to point out what was tripping him up. God's word tells us that we CAN repent of our sins and we WILL be forgiven. Hallelujah for that Sisters! Let me ask you a deep question - you don't have to tell me your answer, but don't hide it from God - are you stumbling? Do you need to be woken up? Is there something in your way, just out of reach, that keeps you from walking with God the way He's called you to? Can you identify what it is? If not, make Psalm 139:23-24 your prayer. Ask God to search your heart and your thoughts and to reveal your sin to you. When you do, He will answer. It may hurt. It may even shock you. (sometimes even though we're doing "good" things, if it's out of Gods will, it can still be a sin) But above all, it will wake you up. The next step? Repent of the sins God reveals to you, and repent also of the ones ever present before you. Then you will achieve the cry of David's heart. You will be in God's "way everlasting". And girls, that's a good place to be! Natalie Grant is one of my favorite vocalists and her song "Awaken" has become a prayer from myself to my Lord. I've posted it above and I hope it speaks to you as much as it has spoken to me. Awaken me Father!

O sweet sweet Lord. I sometimes feel like I don't even know where to begin. You know my heart is heavy. You know what burdens my thoughts. You know what keeps me restless. And I guess that is where I begin. You Know. You are Ominscient. You know all. Search me Lord. Search my thoughts, search my heart. Find in me my inquities and show them to me. My desire is to become more like Christ and I don't want anything in the way of that. I want to know you. My hearts desire is that I might know you more. I want to be in your way everlasting. Search me Father. Search me. Awaken me.

gone

Well goodness ladies. I feel like I have been gone forever! So much has happened in such a short time that it just feels like longer I guess. Let's see... David got a tummy virus at school, no fun. I've been running around town doing some stuff that I think is about to pay off. (don't wanna blog about it just yet, but I'll let you know soon!) And we're gearing up for our new semester of Childrens Choir. We start tonight and I'm a bundle of nerves! I love my kiddos and I know they're excited so that makes it easier. I am allready missing 2 of my "stars" which makes it hard, but we'll manage. I'm so excited about our program and I really hope the kids are too. If not, well it's ordered, they'll learn to love it. LOL! Nah, I think they'll be just as excited as I am.

Goodness, it starts tonight! ACK! I can't wait to get in that room and start praising and celebrating the the kiddos I love most! You can bet we'll be lifting Him up high tonight while we learn our opening song. :)

On a different note gals... I've got something brewing over here. God is mysterious at times and it's driving me crazy! He's got something up His sleeve and I'm almost there, I can feel it. But it's just a *bit* out of my reach. I've got something on my heart. Something BIG and I can feel that He's just about to give it to me and I feel like a kid on Christmas morning going, "can I open it NOW??? Can I open it NOW???". It's an exciting, crazy, nervous time to be me right now. Please pray that I will be patient enough for the answer to come in His time. I don't want to spoil the surprise! I know how He likes to keep us on our toes sometimes! And please pray that the situation will unfold not to the cry of my heart, but to His will. (lol, and please pray that His will and my heart match up!)

I love you girls and will let you in on everything very very soon!! Thank you for praying for me!